Welcome to The Door to E. A series-style newsletter for people obsessed with exploring, explaining, and expanding ideas to unlock human potential. Each week, I publish around 3 chosen series that share ideas, experiences, and stories to help you design your life.
This essay is a part of the Personal Growth Monday series.
Thank you for reading, and please forward this to anyone who you think needs to walk on the journey.
Dear Friends, Seekers, and Everyone else.
It's about 9:15 AM when I write this to you. Just got up from a long sleepless night.
But that doesn't matter because I just wanted a way to start this letter... let me steer things back.
I'm sure I've mentioned this at some point with what I've already written in my past letters, but I have to deal with overthinking and anxiety everyday, but I don't suffer because of them.
Anyone who suffers from both of these combinations will tell you what agony it is, I did too. But after a few years, I stopped suffering.
Turns out, everything is a matter of perspective.
If it’s not good doesn’t make it bad.
Traditional wisdom says Overthinking is negative. Anxiety is a problem.
But here's the catch, people just believe overthinking to be negative because it's been associated with stuff like being paralyzed by worries, inaction, and indecision.
People who overthink, often ask a lot of questions and seem panicky about the consequences.
But here's a thought:
If overthinking is the basis of worries, inaction, and indecision which ultimately means it's the basis of CONSEQUENCES, then does it have to be about bad consequences?
Sure I think a lot, but if I can think a lot, I can think both good and bad.
So I choose to look at overthinking as the power to think of positive scenarios, consequences, and plans to get there. I can also make up contingencies.
This seems weird when you think about it right?
But this is what taking control of the narrative feels like.
The Stories we tell ourselves
Narrative is how you interpret a particular issue or event and shape your opinion around it to maintain a desired perspective.
You see this used every day unconsciously with political campaigns and brand building... even though leadership content you see industry leaders use in their keynote speeches.
And I'm sure you've heard of this saying:
Don't speak negatively about yourself even as a joke. Your body doesn't know the difference. Words are energy and cast spells, that's why it's called spelling, Change the way you speak about yourself and you can change your life. What you're not changing, you're also choosing
~ Bruce Lee
Okay, maybe some of you don't because this may be too niche for you.
But the point is, the story we tell ourselves often is the story that we end up believing, that's how character is built, that's how abilities are formed.
Because for Years this is the story I told myself:
When I was young, I was afraid of exams. If it was just studies, I would do just fine in class and at home, but the thought of exams made my head go haywire.
I just couldn't handle the pressure of the aftermath. Because the education system values HIGH MARKS and GOOD GRADES, that is what determines your life moving forward.
So I used to be stuck in a mental loop of "What if I forget this?", "What if I get sick?", "What if I don't know the answer to that 1 question?", "What if I fail?", "What will my parents think if I don't attempt few questions?"... the thoughts would paralyze me to an extent that I would forget everything I studied.
But I never actually failed anything until I reached 12th grade.
But years later, when I got into college, I knew I had to do something about this, cause even though I hated college, I would hate it more if I failed and had to repeat a class and stay longer.
So this is the story I told myself in college:
When I was young, I would do just fine in class and at home, but the thought of exams made my head go haywire. I just couldn't handle the pressure of the aftermath. Because the education system values HIGH MARKS and GOOD GRADES, that is what determines your life moving forward.
Which gave me the ability to build up scenarios and contingencies so I can find more ways to succeed than to fail. My mental loops allow me to think of stuff like "What if I succeed?", "What can I attempt to reach a goal?", "How much can I omit and still have a favorable result?", "What do I still have if one of my assumptions is wrong?", "What if I work on things preparing for the worst case scenario?". I can find ways to reach my goal any way I can.
I still practice this narrative.
My overthinking is the ability to think in possibilities.
My anxiety is my ability to be sensitive towards things, events and people.
and I can go on and on with this.
Final Words
If you tell yourself that something is negative because of what happened in your past, you will end up believing it.
All it takes is changing the plot, perspective, and the words you use to tell yourself the story of cause and effect. Granted that this isn't easy to do, it is totally worth doing because I see its effect everyday.
I am able to write and present my writing in front of people because of this, I am able to talk to people because of this, and I'm able to give consultation around offers and ecosystems for creators and educators making well over $100K because of this.
I've been able to turn all my insecurities and flaws into assets for my character.
Well, that's it for today.
until next time
Be weird and curiosity
S
P.S. If you are interested in info products and building an information-led creator business, check out Wide Thinker Letters. Series issues go out every Sunday.
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